You Just Get Me Like I've Never Been Gotten Before
by xxxCARxCRASHxHEARTxxx
Summary: Dwicky's fresh out of college and has a brand new job as a counselor at a middle school. YAY FOR HIM! But when he meets his first patient, a 6th grade girl named Dez Morrison, he gets wrapped up in her world and it might be too much for him to handle.
1. A Wish Right Now

Wowwowweewahhhh...

Well this has certainly been a while, and I'm just gonna apologize ahead of time this story is gonna be SUUUPER slow. I recently got into an Avatar The Last Airbender fandom and I got a really bad cold and my math teacher didn't pass me in math even though I TURNED EVERYTHING IN HE JUST LOST IT AND NEVER BOTHERED TO LOOK FOR IT EVEN THOUGH I SENT HIM AN EMAIL. But literally no one else passed that class either so whatever. I'm still very sick with this stomach thing, I'm got an endoscopy and a colonoscopy done and luckily they didn't find any tumors or anything they did see my stomach was redder than it should be and thats a sign of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, so thats good! Sorta.

Okee now this'll be from Dwicky's POV about his first patient, my OC Dez. No there is no romance, that's creepy cuz she's ELEVEN GUYS. This is the first in a series of 3 or 4 stories, and believe me it'll all make sense in the end. There aren't any more characters from the show in this story but there will be in the future! Sorry this isn't a ZADR my friends, I DO have some old ones I wrote that I could make less Godawful and put up here when I'm bored between stories. If not feel free to gimme ideas! LOVE YOU GUYS!

* * *

_"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? I could really use a wish right now..."- B.O.B Ft Haley Williams_

Session 1

So I got my first patient today YAY FOR ME! I gotta say I am SO lucky for getting this counseling job here, no more of the ramen life for me. Though let me just say the interview was a little shorter than I thought it would be... It pretty much just went like this.

"Sooooo... Dwicky?"

"Yep!"

"You just finished your degree in child psychology?"

"Yeah, my bachelor's degree. Fresh out of the horrifying oven that is college."

"Good good. Just one question, are you a pedophile?"

"WHAT? Ew, NO!"

"Then you're hired! Come back here next week for your first day of work!"

Yeah... just a little disconserting.

Oh yeah about this journal, because I have such a selective memory I've decided to write down everything about my counseling sessions with every patient I'm going to have at this skool, different notebooks for every student. This notebook I've written in giant letters "DEZARIA MORRISON" all over it. That's my first patient.

Dezaria Roxanne Morrison. Odd name... But I'm getting distracted.

The principal told me why she was being sent here, apparantly since the start of the school year, which isn't very far because it's only the first week of October, she's gotten into 2 fights, one in which she broke a girl's nose. So you can imagine my surprise when she walked in and looked as if she was barely 95 pounds.

I remember she was pretty tall for an 11 year old girl, like 5'3" or something, and she was this long skinny thing, like a ferret. She had thick, spiky black hair that she had pulled back into a ponytail and bangs that fell into her eyes. What I thought was the weirdest thing was that she wore giant clothes, I mean nothing bad by this but when she walked in I thought my file was wrong and it should've said "Male", cuz she was wearing baggy jeans and a black shirt underneath this big plaid... thing. Like a sweater. She certainly didn't look like a hellraising nosebreaker...

When I adressed her as Dezaria she immediately corrected me, "Dez" is what she likes being called, and the sharpness of her voice made me wonder if she had some sort of resentment towards her name, so of course I asked. She said sometimes people have a kind of look when they read her name, like "Ew Dezaria?..." and they wrinkle their nose.

I dunno I find her name quite pretty

So after, I asked what made her so angry to get in 2 fights in just a month, and she told me about the teasing she got about her father.

THIS was not pleasant.

Her father had his own rock band back in the 80's, 'Hairspray and Sex' (Pffff), and it was in that band he got heavily into heroin. When his band flopped big time he met Dez's mother and had her, but in the stress of her birth and everything he relapsed big time and Dez's mother got a divorce. She said they used to have shared custody cuz he got sober for a few years, but when she was 8 he relapsed AGAIN and tried to pick her up from school strung out and crashed his car into a pole in front of her school.

Ever since then she's been teased about her dad, having horrible rumors spread that he killed 6 kids with his car, and that she shoots up with him, and she's a crack baby, and GOD it's awful.

After her session I wanted to just CRY. I even went to the principal and asked "WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME BEFOREHAND?" so you know, at least it would've been less than a SHOCK! And he just said "Oh, the secretary was supposed to tell you." So, on top of all that the whole staff knows too.

Creepy? YES.

All in all though today's been pretty successful! Although Dez doesn't seem like the happiest girl ever she's very open with me, so I hope she keeps that up.

Also it says in her file she's a "kicker", I don't like that. It's spooky... PRAY FOR ME.

* * *

HYNAHA!

Well there you go. I own no one but Dez. Also I had a dream a few weeks ago I followed Jhonen Vasquez into some knitting store where he picked me up and turned me upside down 0.o then the store lady yelled at us.

OFF WE GO INTO THE WILD BROWN SMOG!


	2. So Number Nine

_"Hey mailbox, it's me, Steve."_  
_..._

_"AUUUGHGHHGHGHGHGHGHHHHHHH!"_

I've been watching a ton of youtube poops and laughing my ass off XD this is what I do in my spare time cuz I have NOOOOOOO LIIIIIIFEEEEE.

Oh they found something in the colon/endoscopy! I have chronic inflammation in my stomach and colon, and thats common in ulcerative colitis so I'm gonna have like a million things of blood taken to see if thats it, its either that or irritable bowel syndrome but at least it wasn't all for nothing ya know?

Oh and also me girlfriend was right, in my dream I followed Jhonen to a knitting store and my mom could tell I wanted his attention so she turned me upside down and handed me to him XD then the lady yelled at us so she put me in a shopping cart and drove me around, then I passed by Jhonen again and was like "HIIIIIIII!" even though I looked like the MEGADUMBASS. Haaaaaaa I love Jhonen dreams...

Well here we go again so hold on tight!

* * *

_"She's so cold and human, it's something humans do, she stays so golden solo she's so number nine, she's incredible math... just incredible math." Scott Matthew_

"I WANT YOU!" I screamed very loud and obnoxiously" I WANT YOUUUUUU, I WANT YOU SO BAAAAD IT'S DRIVING ME MAAAD IT'S DRIVING ME MAAAAAAAAAAAAAD."

I threw the scissors into the ceiling for the millionth time and waited for them to fall again into the couch and spew feathers all over the place. Hey it's my office I do what I want!

Ok yeah I was bored, Dez was running late and this all started when I was spinning scissors around and lost control and watched them fly up into the ceiling. I spent like three minutes FREAKING OUT and jumping up and down to get them back when they fell on their own into the couch, surprisingly entertaining!

"DWICKYYYYYYYY!" the principal came in and practically busted the door down getting in here. OH NO HE FOUND OUT ABOUT THE SCISSORS.

"I DIDN'T DO IT!" I screamed.

"... Didn't do what? I was talking about your singing..." I froze.

"Oh... I knew that..."

Then the scissors fell into the couch anyway. CRAP... I smiled and chuckled nervously while he just stood there with this look of "Why did I hire this guy?"

"I don't even wanna know " he muttered rubbing his eyes "I just came in here to tell you your kid Dez has choir on Tuesday afternoons, only about a 30 minute practice so after she's out she can come to your office or you can pick her up in the music room."

WOW. Thanks for telling me AGAIN. I rolled my eyes and headed out the door without saying a word, then I paused as I realized something.

"Where's the music room?" I asked poking my head back in my office.

"Down straight down the hall, door to the left. Dwicky what the hell did you do to?-"

"I DIDN'T DO IT!"

I hauled ass out of there!

I walked inside the music room, that was more like an auditorium actually, and sat down on one of the seats looking up at the kids onstage. I recognized Dez's little brown head in between a girl with long auburn hair and a boy with black hair.

I didn't know this school had a choir, I used to be in choir in high school but I wasn't even that great a singer, I just fit into the group. I got comfortable as the choir teacher gave the signal from his piano and the kids began the first few lines of 'Bohemian Rhapsody', and they weren't all that bad! I mean it wasn't like those kids could win a Grammy for their version of the song but it was pretty impressive, I was sort of expecting to be writhing on the floor crying and holding my ears but I'm not!

Hmm, that's pretty mean huh? Oh well.

For the parts that Freddie Mercury sang solo they had one kid go up and sing the part alone, first for the "Mamaaaaaaa OOOOOOHHHHHHHH..." they had the dark haired boy go up, for the opera part it was the auburn haired girl, then for the rock part I was surprised when Dez was handed the microphone.

And I was even MORE surprised when she sang better than both of those two kids combined!

Her voice of course wasn't completely developed yet, I mean she's 11 that would've freaked me out, but she was on her way there. Ha I was so impressed... her voice was strong, and not high pitched like most girls her age. It was a little gritty, but still had an incredibly melodic quality to it that sent shivers down your spine. She had real soul.

Quickly after that the song was over, and I almost fell flat on my face trying to get over to Dez before she left the school.

"DEZ! DEZ! "I shouted, jumping up and down to get her attention" IT'S DWICKY!" she and... well everyone else turned to look at me, heh ooooooops...

Actually now that I think about it I was really close to the stage, that was sorta... useless.

The auburn haired girl turned to her and asked "Who's he?"

"I'm the new counselor" I told her, climbing onto the stage " What about you?" everyone else went backstage to probably get their stuff and go back home.

"Mel!" she replied perkily "Dez is my best friend, you're the hyper guy she's seeing to help her out?" Dez blushed.

"I never said that!" she said quickly. I laughed, hyper guy, that's cute.

"Ha it's ok "I said "I know how I act, you'd have to be headless to not know I'm hyper. Well anywayyyyy Dez, since you get out when we still have half an hour for our session you gotta come back to my office when you're done." she frowned, Dez is not amused...

"I didn't know that..." she said.

"Yeah neither did I. So shall we my lady?" I held out my arm for her and Mel giggled.

"Yeah guess I have no choice, see ya later Mel." Mel waved goodbye and took off "I am not taking your arm , I don't want more stupid rumors spread."

I pouted and made puppy whimpering noises for effect.

"But... there's no one here! We could link arms and skip around whistling "Zippideedoodah" and no one would see!" Dez cocked her head and gave me a weird look "heh... too much?" I smiled sheepishly.

"You're... very odd." I snorted.

"Don't hate, appreciate!"

Wait wait WAIIIIIT! YES! SHE SMILED!

"WOW! That's the first time I've seen you smile Dez!"

And then it vanished. Aw, make it come back.

"I don't like my smile, I have these horrible braces..."

"Oh... you know I had braces when I was your age, believe me, when you get them off your smile will be GORGEOUS... oh wait no that came out wrong." I facepalmed while she cracked a tiny smile and chuckled.

"No I know what you meant, it's ok... so are we going back to your office?"

Oooh boy how do I explain this?

"Um... now that I think about it, better we didn't, I got a bit bored and started playing with scissors, and now I need a new couch... heh..."

All she did was stare at first. Then she cracked up harder than I ever thought was possible for her.

"You're hilarious dude. Seriously."

I stared down at her, and for the first time under her bangs I saw her eyes, and I was stunned speechless for a minute.

"Huh... you have green eyes." Dez laughed nervously.

"Uh... yeah."

"No I mean they're REALLY green! Usually people have eyes that are BLUE-green but your eyes are literally green!"

Wow THAT didn't sound creepy at all. She blushed and looked away.

"Sorry" I said quickly "I've never seen eyes that shade before, I was just surprised."

"Okee..."

SILENCE.

"They're very pretty... your eyes. Very pretty." she smiled.

"Thank you... No one ever says anything about my looks, I'm never really complimented... so that was nice of you to say."

I sat there for 5 minutes thinking of something to say. GOT IT!

"Well, you know what? You're only 11, you have years and years to grow up, you're not going to look the same as you do now 3 years from now. It doesn't matter what you look like now because that's gonna change. Everyone changes. And believe me cuz I have a real knack for these things, you're gonna be a catch when you get older." she laughed.

"Think so?"

"Yep! And if I'm wrong you can come back in 3 years and kick my ass, we both know you'll be able to, you little nosebreaker." both of us laughed together.

"Thanks."

We both sat there on the stage, and it was then that I knew for sure that we were gonna get along great from now on.

WHEW.

* * *

Ha I've been lazy. I don't own Dwicky! And if it sounds like he's being a bit of a perv it's cuz I'm exhausted and PMS'ing. I'm in more of a mood to write romance so this happened. THEY'RE NOT GONNA DO IT.

And Sophie's World is the most retarded book ever.

READ AND REVIEW MY LITTLE BABIES!


	3. I Can Fear You Falling

WHOO SENIOR YEAR!

I love my classes, only thing I DON'T like is that my ex boyfriend is in one of my classes, first time since freshman year and he's awkward around me, HIS FAULT!

* * *

_"And I want to get free, talk to me, I can feel you falling. And I won't tempt to be all you need, somehow here is gone."-Goo Goo Dolls_

I wasn't seeing when I walked into my apartment. It was like I was mostly blind, everything was just a huge mass of colors and motion, people, cars, they meant nothing, they were all just shadows... I threw my bag on the floor and rubbed the bridge of my nose to get rid of the massive headache I had.

I needed to forget today...

I grabbed the bottle of Vodka, and started to drink, it's some nasty shit I know, tastes like bad cought syrup, but I just... I can't deal with this right now. I'll deal with the stinking hangover I'll have tomorrow, whatever. I just can't DO IT right now...

As I drank I realized that even though I WANTED to forget today I shouldn't, it might be important... Godammit. I sighed and grabbed Dez's notebook and started to write. You can do this Dwicky...

_4 Hours Ago..._

"Hi Mr. Dwicky!" Dez said as she walked into class. Wow, she seemed rather perky today!

"You look like a happy girl, what's going on?" I asked.

"MY SHIRT! THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON!" she smiled and undid the zipper of her bright red jacket to show me her AWESOME Abbey Road Beatles shirt. I laughed.

"What about it?"

"I can rule the world with this shirt! It is just THAT awesome." So she likes the Beatles, that's something to remember..

"I COMPLETELY agree little one!" she rolled her eyes.

"Yep yep!"

I sighed to myself, I wanted today to be over already, I mean I love counseling Dez so far but today is a day that should actually be productive, it's going to start seeming like WORK. I DON'T LIKE WORK.

"Well anyway Dez, I'm gonna put on my serious cap today because for the last two sessions we haven't talked much about you and your problem with your peers-"

"I don't have a PROBLEM with them, I told you, they were making fun of me."

"Yes and that is understandable, don't get me wrong I'd take a swing at them too, but-"

"So you're saying I shouldn't beat the crap out of them when YOU would? You're being a hypocrite!"

I sat there with my jaw wide open.

God this went downhill fast... what now? I wasn't expecting this out of her. I thought things from now on would be easier.

"Uh... well, I mean you should channel your anger in different ways..." her emerald eyes narrowed.

"I don't have an anger problem."

"I'm not saying you do, I'm saying you need to find a better way to channel your anger."

"But I don't have a problem with it."

"You can't HIT other kids Dez, didn't your mom teach you that?" she looked down at her feet, then under the desk.

"What happened with your leg?" Oh great, I knew I shouldn't have worn shorts today, stupid hot weather!

"When I was little I got my foot caught in an escalator." she winced.

"Ouch, how did that happen?"

"Well... " I shifted in my seat, I don't wanna talk about this I don't wanna talk about this...

"What?"

"I didn't have that great a childhood kay? It was my uncle, I lived with him and my cousins and he didn't like me because I looked so different from his kids and I was all paranormal obsessed. Once he pushed me so I got my shoe caught on the step grate thingy of the escalator and... yeah. He told me later if aliens were real they would have come and saved me."

I stared straight into her eyes.

"No more questions about me from now on." I said bluntly.

"Well you're asking questions about me, it's only fair."

"Yes, but I HAD counseling to help me out with that. You still need help." she leaned back into her seat and crossed her arms. She could look evil when she wants to sometimes...

"What do you think is wrong with me anyway?" I shrugged.

"Right now I don't know, I don't even know if anything is wrong or if you'd just reached your breaking point and snapped a little."

"My mom says nothing is wrong with me."

"Your mom isn't a counselor-"

"I don't have any symptoms of mental disorders. I looked it up, I don't think I'm bi-polar or depressed-"

"You seem a little depressed to me Dez..."

She looked up quickly at me.

"No. I'm not, I'm not don't say that."

I frowned. The second I said that she seemed depressed she tensed right up.

"Why?"

"You-you said yourself you don't know if anything is wrong, you don't know if I'm depressed."

"Well considering the evaluation you filled out before you came here I'm leaning a little towards it..." she stood up so fast I fell out of my chair in surprise. I'm clumsy ok?

"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! DON'T SAY THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT!" she roared, and then bolted out of my class like a bat out of hell, leaving me shaking on the floor not knowing what in God's name to do...

Where was she going? What was that outburst about?

Just... what?

My brain wasn't working as fast as it usually does anymore, everything seemed surreal. First we'd been in here talking about the Beatles and in the next second she ran...

My new patient I saw, nothing she was saying was sticking... Something about her boyfriend breaking up with her or whatever, I didn't care. I was so worried aboout Dez... I really hope she was going home. I hope she got there ok...

After she left my phone rang, and my heart stopped when I saw it was Dez. If for emergency purposes my patients are allowed to call my cell, and shit... Dez had an emergency. My heart was pounding when I opened the phone.

"Dez!" I said, my voice cracking with panic" Dez! What happened?"

"I-I'm sorry..."she said" I shouldn't have ran out, that was stupid. I forgot we moved to a new house in town and I went the way I used to go and I made a wrong turn and now I'm lost." For a second I breathed a sigh of relief, then a whole new wave of panic swept over me.

"Where are you?" I started packing my crap up.

"Downtown... I don't know where all the street signs are broken."

DOWNTOWN? Oh my God... A horrible image flashed of Dez half-naked in some alleyway with some huge greasy man-

DON'T THINK THAT! WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T THINK THAT!

"I'm on my way STAY WHERE YOU ARE!"

"I-I don't know if I can! People are looking at me funny and-"

The phone went out...

One second I was out the door and the next I was flooring it to downtown.

I was fighting back tears and praying. Actually PRAYING. Praying that her battery just died and that she was somewhere away from people and and and...

God I don't know...

I don't know...

A flash of red caught my attention and I pounded the break, wincing as all my stuff fell on the floor of the car. I ran out without even bothering to shut the door and ran to the small figure in a bright red coat, talking to a large man.

"C'mon sweetie..." he said" I know where your home is, lemme take ya there..."

"No! Get away dammit!" the small figure said.

I got there RIGHT as the man grabbed her arm. Without even thinking I jumped and kicked that pervert in the chest with all of my strength, falling flat on the ground and killing my back, I'll feel that in the morning.

"DWICKY!" I looked up from the pavement into Dez's eyes. I got up, ignoring the shooting pain in my shoulder blades and grabbed her arm.

"RUN DEZ C'MON!" I practically dragged her to the car, threw her in, stepped on the gas and hauled ass out of there.

Finally like hours later I stopped in front of her house and the both of us sat there in silence, the only sound being the sound of our panting.

"... Mr-" Dez started, and then I REALLY lost my shit.

"DO YOU HONESTLY KNOW HOW STUPID THAT WAS? YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DAMN DEATH! DO YOU HAVE EVEN HALF A BRAIN IN THAT STUPID LITTLE HEAD OF YOURS?" she looked down.

"I was so angry-"

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! YOU DON'T DO THAT DEZ! YOU COULD HAVE CALLED ANYONE, YOUR MOM, YOUR DAD, ANYONE! ANYONE COULD HAVE PICKED YOU UP AND TAKEN YOU HOME AND I WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO DRIVE ALL AROUND GODAMN TOWN TO SAVE YOUR STUPID ASS!"

"No I couldn't-"

"WHY NOT?"

"Because my mom works until 6, I usually walk home but this time I was so angry I forgot where I was going! And I didn't want to call her and get yelled at... I guess I could've called Mel's mom but I didn't think-"

"OF COURSE YOU DIDN'T! YOU HAVE NO COMMON SENSE EVEN FOR AN 11 YEAR OLD!"

"Please calm down..." she asked in a tiny voice. Tears flowed freely down her face.

Damn... I rubbed my eyes.

"I was just so worried... I was so scared." Then I started to cry and she started to cry and everything went downhill from there!

"I'M SORRY-" she screamed.

"I'M JUST GLAD YOU'RE OK!" I screamed back twice as loud. People in AUSTRALIA could hear us crying.

It was a total sobfest for what felt like EVER, until finally we both calmed down enough to talk again.

"Ummm" she said sniffling "You wont tell my mom right?" I laughed.

"No... "I rubbed my nose, EW" I'm bound to confidentiality, this will just be between you and me ok?"

"Id rather just forget about it..."

"Then we'll do that ok? We'll forget... we'll forget... just promise me one thing."

"What?"

I put a hand under her chin to look deep into her eyes.

"Use your common sense from now on. This is the age when you begin to become a woman, and you need to make good choices concerning your life. Think things all the way through... and don't scare me like that again." she smiled.

"You actually care about me..."

I smiled.

"Yes... I do..." she hugged me loosely around the neck.

"Then I promise."

"Good. Now go home and, do your homework or something. I'm gonna go throw up." I was, believe me.

She hopped out and waved goodbye to me before going pulling out her keys and walking inside her house.

_Present Time..._

I sighed in relief as I finished the last few lines in the notebook, it was over now. I can just get drunk, throw up, pass out, wake up in the morning, throw up some more and forget about this...

Why do I care so much?

* * *

Ha wow that was hard to write. I don't own Dwicky but I DIIIIID get flirted by this cute mariachi guy at a baptismal I went to today. He was constantly staring and smiling, I didn't flirt back but the dude WAVED GOODBYE to me as I got into the car. I've never been flirted with so heavily!

Until next time little monsters (Gaga reference).


	4. If I Could Only Reach You

I feel so epic.

People are still favoriting my 6 chapter piece of smut Gorillaz story XDDD I feel like running around like "REMEMBER THE NAME!"

* * *

_" I'm under your thumb, under your spell, can't you see? If I could only reach you, if I could make you smile, if I could only reach you, that would really be a breakthrough."- Queen_

I growled and adjusted the wings on my back for what felt like the millionth time to make sitting a bit less painful as hell.

... Oh yeah it's Halloween by the way.

I was... eh I didn't really know what I was. I just whipped together some old vampire fangs from like 10 years ago and bought some wings in a Halloween store. God it was so embarassing to come into work today, NO ONE WAS DRESSED UP. I mean the students did of course but none of the faculty! The principal again have me that "Why did I hire you?", I swear I'm gonna be fired soon...

Dez came in and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me.

"Hallooooo!" I called.

"What're you supposed to be?" she asked, cocking her head. I laughed.

"Even I don't know, don't worry bout it." she frowned and looked close up at my face.

"Are you wearing eyeliner?"

"Yes."

"... Cool."

"Brings out my eyes don't it? Anyway, what're you? A 60's girl?"

Dez had on a long light green skirt, a white tank top and a flowery headband with John Lennon glasses. She shrugged.

"Sorta, I'm a hippy." I frowned as I watched her sit down, she hadn't smiled once since she came in here, and just... her body movements, they were slow and deliberate, what was up?

"Who spat in your Count Cocoa Fangs this morning?"

"I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"If you're fine what should I not worry about?"

"I just had a bit of a tough day..."

"Well, have a seat Janis Joplin and we'll talk about it." she sat down and I sighed heavily, I've never seen her this upset just coming in for a session, I'm supposed to fix this.

"I'm not in the mood to talk about it." she muttered.

Oh GOD not again! I felt nauseous remembering last week's hangover.

"Dez look, if we're going to make progress you need to open up to me. I know it's hard but I'm not a mind reader, there's no other way. I'm not trying to pressure you but we aren't going to get anywhere with you keeping your mouth shut." she just glared at me.

"I. DON'T. WANT. TO." I sighed, might as well go along with this, I couldn't handle another repeat of last week.

"Fine, just try not to stab me 15 times Leslie Van Houten."

OOPS.

I was hopeful for a minute she wouldn't get the reference, but then she banged her head on my desk and started to sob. OH MY GOD I AM THE STUPIDEST PERSON IN THE WORLD.

"Oh man, I said running to her side-er, trying to anyway. The wings were caught in the back of my chair so I faceplanted into the carpet first. The floor tastes funny...

"Are you ok?" Dez asked through her tears.

"Fine," my nose was dripping blood, but it went with the costume so whatever"Are you?" she shook her head.

"Remember when I told you that people spread rumors that I was a crack baby? When I came to school everyone started laughing and now they're saying I'm an LSD freak, and that my dad's selling it to me. I even got asked by these stupid 8th graders if I could get a hold of some! All that and you just called me one of the Manson girls!"

My stupid big mouth.

I'm not getting better than this, I'm getting worse! For a minute I considered resigning and getting a job at McMeaty's or something, where I wouldn't have to say anything more than "Ya want meatballs in that shake?". Because everytime I open my mouth I ruin Dez's life even more than it already is.

No... I can't do that. I didn't go to college to work in fast food, I did it to become a counselor and help children who can't help themselves. I just better start helping, and fast. I kneeled down next to her.

"Dez, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. I was just joking, and it was a bad and tasteless joke that I'm going to hell for. What can I do to make it up to you?" I looked up at her with big puppy eyes. I don't know what it is about me but I do the puppy eyes better than anyone I know, who says blue eyed people can't do them?

"I dunno Mr. Dwicky "she sniffed" I don't like asking things of people." I thought hard, staring up at the ceiling fan that was twirling around and around and-

I got it!

"What if I took you to the beach Dez?"

She immediately gave me a "WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY ?" look.

"How? I-I don't even-"

"Come on, it's perfect swimming weather thanks to global warming! It's only like 15 minutes away, and this way we can have fun and I can drop you off at home. What do you say? Cramped little office or cool breezy beach?" she blinked.

"I guess... beach-"

"THEN LETS GET GOING WOMAN!" I grabbed her arm and ran her to the parking lot, mostly because I was afraid someone would see us and think I was taking her home to RAPE HER!

But I wasn't.

"Ow ow OW!" I cried as we got into my car" BURNING!" I wasn't the only one in the seventh layer of hell either! Dez looked near tears again because of the hot seats, she was only in a skirt anyway.

"GRR-AUGH-FIX IT!" she screamed.

"Fixing!"

I pushed the button to let the convertible top down, and the second it did Dez turned to me with one of her rare 100 watt smiles.

"I've never been in a car with the top down before!" I smiled back to her, happy that such a small thing could really brighten her day up.

I turned on the radio and backed out of MY VERY OWN PARKING SPOT BABY, heading to the beach.

Everything was going great, untillll I noticed what song was playing on the radio...

_"Mucho gusto, me llamo Bradley, I'm hornier than Ron Jeremy..."_

Ooookeeeeee Dez is too young for this song, I leaned over to switch it to something more appropriate but to my horror-

"SO SHE TOLD ME TO COME OVER AND I TOOK THAT TRIP, AND THEN SHE PULLED OUT MY MUSHROOM TIP-"

NO THAT WASN'T ME SINGING.

"I DIDN'T KNOW SHE HAD THE G.I JOE KUNG FU GRIP-"

"OH MY GOD DEZ!" I yelled, blushing. She looked up at me, horrified.

"What?"

"You... you KNOW this song?" she nodded slowly.

"I like Sublime..."

I had to admit, I was a bit impressed. This was music from when I was pretty much her age!

"Sorry" I said giggling" It was just weird to hear you sing that song, you're so innocent-" she pouted.

"I'm not that innocent."

"You just quoted Britney Spears, ya know." I laughed at the face she made.

"WHATEVER! Look, whenever I visit my dad I sorta... jack a few CD's from him... Don't tell my mom I know that song though or she'll kill me."

"Ha, I'm bound to secrecy, no worries." I winked at her and she turned to look out the window.

When Dez and I got to the beach we unpacked the blanket I keep in the backseat and took a really good spot, close to the tide, and away from the screaming children.

"MAN it's hot." Dez said" Are you hot? I'm hot."

Then she ripped off her skirt-

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I screamed and turned away from the UNDERAGE HORROR.

"I have some shorts on ya know..."

Oh, what do you know? She did.

Hmmm her striptease gives me an idea for revenge...

"BEAAACHHHH PARRRTTYYYYYY!" I screamed as loud as I possibly could, tore off my shirt and popped my hip.

"...My God." Dez said.

"Don't hate, tiny human. Come on! Let's go swimming!" I grabbed her hand.

" But-"

"But nothing! Don't be so walled up!"

I was running Dez into the tide, but to my surprise she veered to the left and started dragging me to some small cliffs. Skinny girl is strong!

"If we're gonna swim we're gonna swim where I like to!" she said. Dez and I climbed up onto one of the higher, scarier rocks.

"Uhhhh..." I said, staring into the abyss" Is this safe?"

"PUSSY!"

"AUUGHH!"

"Come one! On the count of three! And if you don't jump you will SERIOUSLY regret it." Awww mannnn...

"One..." I muttered.

"Two..."

"THREE!" we both shouted and jumped.

My stomach flew up into my throat as the water hurled up in my face. I sunk so far into the ocean I could see all the fishies swimming around and the multicolored reefs before I floated back to the surface.

And DURR the first thing I see is Dez's huge brace filled grin.

"How was that?" she asked. I spat out saltwater.

"HORRIBLE" I said" don't ever ever make me do that again." she laughed.

"PUSSY!"

"AUGHH!" I don't know everytime she says it I don't expect it! Don't judge me!

"It wasn't that bad, I mean at first it's scary, but when you fall it's fun!"

"Nu-uh! It's bad all the way around!" she rolled her eyes and backstroked away.

Yeahhhh that's right psycho girl, swim away!

I pathetically doggy paddled my own way and explored this cool little area we jumped in, I don't go here much, mostly because I swim like a frantic three year old and I sunburn. I go bright freakin' red, like an embarrassed lobster. But you know, desperate times call for desperate measures! It's definately worth seeing Dez so happy anyway, I've never seen her smile so much...

Still, I have to find some method of getting her to open up to me, I don't want our sessions to keep yo-yoing or else it'll be one step forward, ten steps back all year.

"SHARK ATTACK!"

Whuh-

_SMACK!_

WHATTHEFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

"DEZ!" I screamed "WHAT'S ON MY HEAD?" BLIIIND! I WAS BLIIIND!

"SEAWEED!" she said from... somewhere... NYAH SEAWEED, YOU GET OFF MY HEAD!

"IMA KILL YOU!" I screamed once I got the stupid crap off my head and threw it, aiming for her face. ERR missed!

"Kill me with that aim? HA!" Dez said swimming in a circle all SUPERIORLY.

"HEYYYYYYY!" the both of us whirled around in horror, this giant FAT MAN with stubby arms wasn't so happy with the seaweed in his face" WHERE ARE YA, SKINNY LITTLE PUNK?"

.

"... I don't think he saw you" Dez whispered to me "Just... swim... away..."

"OH YEAH I SAW YA! SKINNY LITTLE MAN WITH A GOATEE-"

"SWIM FOR YOUR LIIIIIFE!"

Dez and I swam like Mel Gibson was back there! Frantically, and splashing water all over the place, we sorta... gave the wrong impression...

You know, sometimes life can really slap you in the face, and it makes you open your eyes and realize that stupid things in the world are all around you... this was one of those moments.

"SHARRRRRK!" some woman screamed.

In the next few seconds it was like a reinactmant of that one scene in The Lion King, you know, when Simba's running away from the stampede?

And Dez and I just stood there with out mouths wide open, staring at each other in horror.

"...What... what..." she stuttered.

"WE WERE NEVER HERE." I said sternly and we walked back to the car.

We didn't make out of the parking lot because we were laughing too hard.

"A- and did you see the woman with the baby?" Dez said, I wiped tears out of my eyes.

"GOD yes! It was like Titanic, 'I HAVE A CHILD!'" we doubled over laughing even harder for God knows how long.

When we finally gained most of our composure back, I was able to drive her home, we still giggled like maniacs though.

"So I'll see you next week?" I asked. Dez smiled, the sunburn across her cheeks seemed to grow redder as she smiled.

"Yeah. And thank you for this Mr. Dwicky. It was a good time, fun like this was something I really needed..."

Hmm... fun like that was what she needed?...

"Oh my God." I said.

BREAKTHROUUUGHHHH!

* * *

WOOOOO GIANTS IN THE WORLD SERIES! SUCK IT PHILLIES!


End file.
